Blame...

Blame

¹To say or think that a person or thing is responsible for something bad that has happened.

²To find fault with.

Blame is an interesting thing— it is a necessary evil.  Blame seems to carry a negative connotation with it, as you don't want to be blamed and to blame can be perceived as petty.  One can though, of course, take fault and that is considered being responsible.  To get back to blame though, we also need it.  It is far worse to have nothing or no one to blame.

I have recently suffered a hip injury that ended my plans to pursue a professional aerial career.  This turned out to be biological, and simply just how I was built.  I was not meant to be dancing, stretching, and pursuing the activities I have pursued my whole life.  Therefore, there is no one and nothing to blame.  

This sucks more than anything.  I am angry, I was very angry and upset and there was nothing to direct it at.  Am I supposed to just hate the universe or whatever god I may believe in just because I suddenly got hurt, need surgery, and lost a career?  It is crazy and irrational.  I can go back to the number of doctors I have seen and who have treated me over the course of my life, but I was also told this condition has not really been known or given attention until recently.  I could blame the teachers and my parents who I used to tell I was in pain and it didn't feel natural, but then again how are they expected to actually know that my hips were not designed for ballet?

Not a soul, entity, or anything to blame for this.  AND IT SUCKS.  I deserve to be angry, it has caused me pain and I have had to give up dancing, which I have done for 21 years and loved for 21 years.  Emotionally and mentally I can say that all of this would have been easier if I could have placed the blame.  Even if I had fallen performing aerials could I have dealt with this situation.  Instead, without blame, I was stuck just hating the situation and wishing it had never happened.

So why does blame have to have a negative connotation?  Blame allows for balance.  Sometimes we are at fault and we are to blame; sometimes we are not.  Sometimes it may be just how it is, and there is no one to blame.  But it sure is easier when there is blame or fault, even if it is your own.  For one reason or another, the human species have developed this concept of blame for a reason, and that is to allow acceptance.  It is easier to accept something when you know where the blame is; but you know what; the blame could be good.  You can blame someone for loving you, as easily as you can blame someone for hating you.  People mess up.  

At the end of the day, blame is a good thing.  It gives us peace of mind and balance.  At the end of the day, these are the things that give us comfort and security.